Brendan Burke always put others first

For the past couple of months until his tragic death  in an automobile accident in Indiana last weekend, Brendan Burke, the son of National Hockey League executive Brian Burke, became the public face of homosexuality in hockey — in part by default but also in many ways by his own choosing.

Armed with the undying love and support of his entire family, Brendan, who was known as “Burkie” to the players on the top-ranked Miami University (OH) hockey team that he managed — or “Moose,” as his dad often called him — opened up about being gay in a widely publicized article on ESPN.com, and from that point on he became known as a courageous “trailblazer” and an inspiration to millions worldwide.

Yet for the 21 years that he spent largely outside of the spotlight, including more than a decade in Canton, Brendan was just as important being himself — a loving son, grandson and brother who put everyone else first, and a “smart, handsome and friendly” young man who could charm even the most hard-hearted of souls, according to his sister Molly.

“He was just remarkable,” said Molly, 18, in a telephone interview Sunday night. “I’d be hard pressed to find somebody else out there who’s got the heart and the personality that Brendan had.”

In addition to his father and Molly, Brendan leaves behind his mother, Kerry Burke, of Canton; two older siblings, Katie and Patrick; and two little sisters from his father’s second marriage: 5-year-old Mairin and 4-year-old Gracie, who live in Toronto.

Molly said Brendan was close with all of them, including the two youngest and their mother, Jennifer. He and Gracie even share the same birthday, and he had recently gone to Toronto to visit with them before returning to school in Ohio.

In fact, Molly said her brother had the “best last year he could have asked for,” highlighted by his sister Katie’s wedding in August and an unforgettable experience at the NHL Winter Classic at Fenway Park in January. He also received a ton of positive feedback after the ESPN article came out in November — including from his father, a larger than life figure in the world of pro hockey who publicly supported his son from the moment he learned he was gay.

And Brendan embraced his newfound role as spokesman, although by no means did he let it define him, according to Molly.

Not only did he have far-reaching interests ranging from hockey to politics; he was also a “diligent, bright and enthusiastic” student, and an empathetic friend who had an almost uncanny ability to pick people up when they were down.

“Ever since he was little he took care of me,” Molly said. “He’s always taken care of me.”

Anthony Rotella, one of Brendan’s childhood friends from St. John’s School in Canton, described him as the “kind of kid that made you feel like what you were saying was important, even if it wasn’t.”

“Even from the age of 10, it was impossible to ignore the aura of charisma that surrounded him,” Rotella said, adding that he had a sense from a young age that Brendan was “going to go places.”

“He just drew people to him,” said Molly, noting that the large funeral planned for Tuesday was exactly what he would have wanted, “And everyone just really misses him.”

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Posted by Jay Turner on Feb 11 2010. Filed under Features, News. Both comments and pings are currently closed.